What Always Makes Me Feel Better

AKA: The story of the “you are never grumpy” remark.
We all have our days where nothing seems to go our way. And there are those days when all goes right but your energy is fully gone at the end of the night. My manager once said, “I never see you grumpy”. I laughed. Truth is I do have my moments. But when you live your teenage years in a chaotic place, you learn to look for those nice things which will make you smile. And you are able to smile despite the fact that your house is falling on you. You end up rebelling against the expectancy of joining of the war. You don’t cave in; you don’t join them in misery. But choose to try to make things better for everyone by staying happy. Whether it is so they don’t have to worry about you or you don’t have to worry about them, it’s just a matter of perspective.
There are only a handful of things which make me grumpy. And most of those things are on a selfish survival level. Hunger, sleepiness (the type where my legs jump if cold and my eyes are the heaviest thing in the world), hitting and hurting people as a sport (why?) and migraines. When I am grumpy I seldom show it. If you know me, you know. I transform from the loud non-stop talkative girl to the quiet wallflower with the shy smile who wants the world to leave her the eff alone (unless it is hunger, then buy me a burger.)
People should always find a solution for what makes them feel bad. My stomach basically sets me a timer on grumpiness. Either I cool it off or I suffer the consequences. I guess that is another important reason for me to try to control my negative feelings. I like food you know. In my case there are a couple of things which always work and maybe you can try.
  1. Happy cheesy music with happy lyrics and happy tempo. (Aka: AQUA and the sort)
  2. Singing out loud until my throat hurts. (Usually when I am feeling lonely and depressed).
  3. Cooking. (Though I wonder what kind of energy goes into my meal when I cook with negative feelings.)
  4. Cookies dip in milk. Especially when losing all games to my boyfriend. (I have a whole philosophy behind it.)
  5. Writing my soul out until my hand bleeds or the page breaks.
  6. Reading a book under the sun on a bench in a green area. (A very limited option in this country.)
  7. Browsing books for two hours in a bookstore or library -from history to fiction to cooking books to astronomy and YA-. (This is my therapy gents; hence living close to a bookstore or library it’s a matter of importance.)
  8. After a long week of hard work and finally days off in sight, a big cold Pear Magners Cider. (Just because.) 
People would add “talking about how you are feeling with others,” but as I pointed out already, usually I just want to be left alone. Bug and die. So in the end is not that I am never grumpy. I just manage most of the time to deal with such emotions, except when I am hungry or sleepy. If so, feed me or let me sleep; not much else to do there. My trick is not to feed the already negative feeling with more negative acting, which will just add up more negative feelings to the soup (guilt, regret, selfishness, pity, etc.)
And those are the things that always make me feel better. Nerveless to say, I told my manager, “if you see me quiet, then I am most certainly grumpy.” I’ll write later about my ‘cookies and milk’ philosophy.  

What always makes you feel better?

she writes